Hey, everyone! I have a question for you:
How’s your heart today? This is a question Kris Carr posed during her online coaching last week. She suggested we ask our loved ones, you know, to give them a chance to express their true answers. It’s all too common for us to answer: “I’m okay, I’m alright.” At the time it seems the easiest response.
But honestly, folks, are we REALLY okay? It appears to me even wise and strong folks are admitting on social media that this pandemic is overwhelming for a variety of reasons. It affects each of us differently, yet most of us are actively trying to avoid crisis mode. Be it a crisis of health, of finances, of unemployment, of homeschooling the kids, and so on.
Many of us feel like we are slogging down a long muddy road with no relief in sight. So how do we find our way out of this zigging and zagging of daily life now? How do we maintain our sanity for the long-term during this pandemic?
This question rumbled in my head for two weeks. I let this question simmer and percolate until one day…two words popped into my brain! Emotional Resilience!
Yes! So true, more than ever, we need our badass, powerful emotional resilience to be charged and ready for whatever arises during the day. This topic is so important, please put these two words on your radar.
To be certain that I understood this phrase, I researched it for days. Then I watched TED Talks from experts who survived tragedies. They offered wise and insightful points for us to ponder and hold close for future reference.
(I’ll include links to my research in the podcast description so you may dive in deeper if you wish.)
But for today, I’ll condense their advice. You may not need this today, but if in three months you (or someone you love) needs to re-charge your resilience, well, you can jump start from here.
First, a definition:
“Emotional Resilience refers to one’s ability to adapt to stressful situations. More resilient people are able to ‘roll with the punches’ and adapt without lasting difficulties. Less resilient people have a harder time with stress and life changes – both major and minor.”
“Research shows that those who deal with minor stresses more easily also can manage major crises with greater ease. So, resilience has it benefits for daily life as well as for the rare major catastrophe.”
Okay, so what makes a person resilient? Experts give 10 bullet points.
An emotionally resilient person:
- Is aware of her thoughts, emotions, and inner potentials
- Thinks before reacting
- Is patient, understanding, and willing to adapt
- Is high on acceptance and forgiveness
- Focuses on finding solutions
- Expresses her emotions in a socially acceptable way
- Does not bottle up negative emotions
- Is able to create and sustain long-term relationships
- Is not ashamed to ask for help when they need it the most
- Believes in sorting out conflicts through discussions
It was reassuring to me to review these insights. I’ve usually felt confident I would be able to endure a crisis and come out the other side in one piece. But this pandemic has thrown me off my game.
Today we live with a federal government that appears to value money and greed over the lives of Americans.
We are, in a sense, on our own to shore up our finances, our personal safety, and our sense of well-being. In other words, we are advocates for ourselves. And once we take care of ourselves, we may support all others in need.
We especially need to be resilient so we may help:
- those who have lost a loved one
- those who have suffered a job loss or those who struggle to keep their business afloat
- those non-profits whose sponsors can’t afford to continue donations
- those recovering from COVID19 who will have long-term issues
- and so many others – all we need to do is pay attention to see who is struggling
***Clearly, the world needs each of us to be as strong and resilient as we can muster.
So that begs the question: How do we build up our resilience?
- Build connections with other people
- Take care of yourself
- Manage your thoughts
- Cultivate hobbies
- Find balance
Here’s a side note: There’s another phrase that describes the foundation of resilience. It’s called Emotional Intelligence. Now, that’s a topic for another day, but Emotional Intelligence is crucial if we are to strengthen our Emotional Resilience.
Okay, cool. Let’s move on.
One expert suggested we consider how our “purpose in life” affects our resiliency. Another perspective is to consider our “WHY.” “Why” do you want to improve your life skills and be a contributor to a better world? What do you hope to accomplish?
If you draw a blank on this, the experts suggest the following steps to finding your purpose…or your “why:”
- Help others
- Be proactive
- Move toward your goals
- Look for opportunities for self-discovery
Four simple steps that can change your life if you are seeking your higher purpose in life. And once we have a higher purpose, our emotional resiliency evolves and keeps on growing. This I can say is so true in my life.
This has played out so effectively in the last few years for me. It’s amazing. And I’m betting you can say the same.
So folks, let’s keep recharging our emotional resilience – and let’s continue to take care of ourselves and others.
Let’s bring our “best selves” to the world, each and every day.
That’s it for now.
**Transcript from my podcast EP047 published on May 17**
Here are my sources links for this episode: